This should be recognizable. I wanted to veer away from my discourse on the 9-5 grind and attempt to engage something a little different. Here, I wondered what sort of conversation I might be able to forge between two different generations. **Digital Natives is a term used to refer to those people of the Y Generation born between 1982-95**.Sorry about the wacky spacing...MS Word hates me big time.
Digital Natives
Men at twenty-five howl over shrines of conquered beer cans,
Chanting their victories into the 3 a.m. that always listens.
Men at twenty-five, lost in their drum circles, smell of weed,
And the grimy chorus of that Zeppelin song everyone knows.
They’re camouflaged in decades they’ll never truly understand.
Having slipped the silk noose and action item reports for
torn blue jeans and Ginsberg, men at twenty-five tremble
At words like equity and mortgage, that corrosive gargle
Etched into the graying temples of men twice their age.
These boys, like their fathers, branded with a single letter.
On 48th at Manny’s, men at twenty-five sift through wax coated sleeves.
Those once slick novelties, their ripped edges and weathered faces gone “vintage.”
Billy,
ReplyDeleteI like what you have done with this draft. There is a lot more voice to this draft than the previous one we saw. There are still a couple places that might benefit from some expansion to add a little depth to this draft.
I love the idea of them chanting their victories into the 3.a.m., but what at 3 a.m.? Neon signs, dive bars, strip joints? Just a few possibilities to play with the image a little. I'm also not sold that men at 25 would be lost in drum circles. I think there might be something else that 25-year-olds might get lost in, maybe chasing women or fancy cars. Just a thought.
Good work on this draft, and I hope to see another one at some point.